The Caves Of Androzani (1984) Review

"I come from Androzani with my Peri on my knee.."

As the Joker might say, we all have that one bad day, and the Doctor had his in the Caves Of Androzani...

WRITTEN BY

Robert Holmes, classic series savant.

PLOT

Whilst exploring the terrain of Androzani Minor, the Doctor and Peri are caught in a lunatic war between embittered scientist Sharaz Jek and greedy politician Morgus that has sent the solar system into chaos due to Androzani Minor being the only planet to provide the invaluable drug Spectrox that can double humanity's lifespan.

In addition to this, they are also poisoned by accident and the only cure is the elusive bat's milk found in the depths of the planet. Driven by his guilt for bringing Peri into this, the Doctor tears through the cluster of androids, mercenaries and armies led by a psychotic and a sociopath for one final act of compassion...

ANALYSIS

This was the Doctor Who story that I got hyped up for more than any other(except maybe Genesis Of The Daleks). The endless glowing reviews, the concept of the Doctor(especially Davison) going full Rambo just to save his friend, the fact that Robert Holmes wrote this... I'm not even sure what I was expecting. Some kind of Shakespearean work of art, perhaps.

But yeah, I let myself get carried away and felt the crushing disappointment as it failed to live up to my expectations. That's not to say Caves Of Androzani isn't excellent. It is a dark, oppressing story where everything that can go wrong, goes wrong and then some. It is the epitome of the so-called "Sawardiverse", where everyone's out for themselves and heroism means an ignominious death.

But like the Fifth Doctor, I do not accept it. Death is preferable to such a boring, meaningless, glum existence. And that's the real problem I have here. There's no possibility of a happy ending, no carrot being tangled in front of us only to be taken away. Even a story such as this could've used a little heart, just so we'd have something to break.

There's also some basic flaws: whilst most of the characterisation is stellar, Morgus's army(in particular the General and Major Salateen) aren't nearly as interesting as they should be given that the entire first episode is focused on them. The mercenaries are suddenly dropped into the story without any kind of introduction. To be perfectly honest, the first one and a half episodes were kind of dull, if I'm allowed to say that.

Without the borderline cinematic(as far as you can go with the BBC budget) direction of Graeme Harper, it would have fallen apart. It's his work, and the strength of the actors, that pushes the Caves Of Androzani over this initial stumble and into true brilliance as we uncover the personal conflict between Jek and Morgus, Holmes's acidic satire comes into play and things get truly tense as the final battle draws nearer.

CHARACTERS

Hats off to Peter Davison for a superb final showing. There's the Fifth Doctor retrospective ahead, but suffice to say, he really runs with this script as he has all season, indulging in almost Tom Baker-esque levels of sarcasm with Chellak early on and then confronting the madness around him with admirable stoicism

Nicola Bryant doesn't really have much to do in this story, as she's Sharaz Jek's prisoner for pretty much the entire time(Peri obviously being incapable of surviving on her own in this environment). It's really sad that we never got a chance to see her and the Fifth Doctor in a more traditional adventure together on-screen, since their mischievous chemistry at the end of Planet Of Fire was really enticing.

Christopher Gable's Sharaz Jek... what a character! Not a hero, not a villain... perfectly in the middle. He's a nasty, manipulative creep(whose love for latex transcends the irritation it must cause to his burns) and yet he has a perfectly valid reason for his boiling hatred and his love of beauty is downright tragic. He's like the Phantom of the Opera crossed with Darth Vader.

John Normington's Morgus is a curious fella. Despite Sharaz Jek's entire life now being devoted to bringing him down, he seems completely oblivious and is happy to continue just making the most profit off of his position, including even surreptitiously trading with Jek without the latter's knowledge. It's like Jek has a crush on him, but in reverse.

Bringing all the old companions and especially Anthony Ainley back for the regeneration scene was a nice touch, although I'm not gonna lie... the talking heads flying around Davison were even sillier than Troughton's delirious regeneration.

And now we've got Colin Baker as the Sixth Doctor! I love Colin, but his appereance ends the story on a very weird note. It's like, this dramatic, desperate fight for freedom led up to an over-the-top narcissist taking over the show?

NOTES

*If I sounded overly critical of this story, I'm sorry. It was an incredibly gripping hour and a half, and one of the very few Doctor Who stories to step outside "safe horror", as it were, into something truly terrifying, and I find that very commendable. Not to rag on Steven Moffat again, but this is the show I signed up for. I think this sort of a dangerous story is what we need now in our flippant 2017 Doctor Who even more than we did in passive 1984 Doctor Who. But then again, with everyone fussing about modern day politics, perhaps it would just depress the audience even further.

*Seeing Davison play up the Doctor's arrogance(as he finds the idea of Sharaz Jek being more intelligent than him inconceivable) was quite odd. This incarnation has been a number of things, but arrogant hasn't really been one of them.

*The Caves Of Androzani is very different from other regeneration stories. It's less saying goodbye to this Doctor(Planet Of Fire actually did that) and more taking advantage of being the last story to do something completely different and unique.

*At one point, I thought Salateen's android had replaced him and was tricking Chellak, which I think would've been a nice twist.

*Instead of the traditional transformation, we have an interesting 2001: A Space Odyssey regeneration effect.

CONTINUITY ADVISOR

1) Since Castrovalva, the Doctor has carried around a stick of celery on his lapel and now, at Peter Davison's request, we finally find out why. I liked hearing the explanation at last(although "I heart celery" would probably have been truer to the character). However, I will say I was let down by the fact that it didn't tie into the Spectrox toxeamia at all.

2) As I mentioned already, the Doctor becomes delusional as he regenerates and hallucinates hearing his old companions and the Master(hell yeah!), which is a fitting touch.

BEST QUOTE

"I'm going to die soon anyway, unless of course I can find the antidote... I owe it to my young friend to try because I got her into this - so you see I'M NOT GOING TO LET YOU STOP ME NOW!!" - Best cliffhanger ever.

CONCLUSION

It's a dark, sad end that leaves a massive impact on the viewer.