Mummy On The Orient Express (2014) Review

"Hi Peter. I'm you in a few years. FYI: Don't stick around the show for too long."

NOTE: This is my original review of this episode that I made on GateWorld Forum in 2014.

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Mummy On The Orient Express is the best Peter Capaldi episode yet. I'm not saying it's entirely rejuvenated my faith in his era(particularly since, again, this episode was written by someone other than Steven Moffat), but it's certainly proven to me that when written well, Series 8 can be fantastic.

PLOT

Whilst taking a ride on the Impossible Gimmick Express, a mummy starts to attack various passengers and staff members, giving each 66 seconds, plus a mysterious computer locks everyone down and forces the Doctor and his audience(seriously, what were those other scientists even doing?) to find the cause.
(2015 Note: There should've been 6 mummies, then we could've had a 666 joke.)

Besides paying homage to Hercule Poirot, we're dealing with a classic case of a good claustrophobic episode, similar to Midnight and The Wheel In Space(which I happen to be watching right now, in fact). The ticking clock adds tension and gives everything a deadline, which I love.
The solution might've been a teeny tiny fast(I was convinced they had ended up in heaven) and Gus wasn't explained at all, but other than that, I loved it to bits.

CHARACTERS

When the Doctor and Clara were at that beach, I swear I saw an older, worn-out William Hartnell in Capaldi's eyes. His performance was just that good. I loved how he didn't turn out to have lied about the "I knew she might die" thing. The Twelfth Doctor rocked this episode.

Clara wasn't annoying!! The episode fit into my viewpoint of Clara being a whiner where traveling with the Doctor was concerned and almost totally rehabilitated her.
Basically, she's gone from Jar Jar Binks annoying to C-3PO annoying(not that I find either of them annoying... it's just meant as a reference point). It's sad that the next week trailer promises a return to the awfulness...

Perkins was an absolute hit. At the end, I could practically see the Twelfth Doctor begging for him to hang around. He would've been a perfect guy companion. We really need more of them. 

NOTES

*So if this is the same train as the one from The Big Bang, how come the Eleventh Doctor never arrived, where's the Egyptian Goddess and how did the Twelfth Doctor even remember that phone call from 1100 years ago?

*I'm gonna visit the dentist tomorrow. Pray for my soul, folks.
(2015 Note: It was fine. I was able to do a great Sylvester Stallone impression hours afterwards.)

*What was with the super fast conclusion to the Express storyline? It just blew up and suddenly everything was okay.

*Funny how there was no Voyage Of The Damned reference, given the similarity between the episode styles?

*Okay, here's an obvious one, but it must be asked: How the hell is there an Orient Express in space(yes, I know they explained it)???

*Has anyone else realised that the Doctor Who universe is absolutely bonkers? There's an Orient Express and Titanic in space, the Devil in a black hole, dinosaurs on a spaceship, a forest powering the ship's oxygen tanks, a sea working as an engine, a dinosaur and a giant Cyberman in Victorian London, Queen Victoria meets werewolves, Shakespeare meets witches, giant wasp aliens, giant ant aliens, giant bee aliens, giant hippo aliens, aliens who scoop out the planet's core and drive the planet around, faces on concrete slabs, living drawings, evil TVs that suck your face off, statues that send you through time, etc.
The only exceptions are the First and Ninth Doctor eras, which get burdened with building the series mythos. That's why I love 'em so much. 

*Why did the ALIEN mummy make an American military salute?

*What was the point of arresting the Doctor, only to let him loose the next scene?

BEST LINE

"I'm the Doctor. Nosy bugger." *cue Joker grin*

CONCLUSION

A fantastic, daring episode that immediately highlights the mediocrity of the other Capaldi episodes thus far. It also cements Capaldi's position as the Twelfth Doctor.